it's times like that that worry me.

7/8 of our lives in nj. that's right, its gonna be over come friday. I don't know why people keep lamenting and complaining about how the school sucks and how they wanna leave asap. Is it really that bad, actually? well, if there was one thing that I'd miss in NJ, that'd be us. hahaha

and this is when people start rebutting. yea la! that's the only thing that'll be treasured what. friendships la! but there's one thing for sure that people often disregard - the fact that we are bonded by ill feelings, bonded by can i say a tormenting school life? haha. that's how people in dance supposedly bond, no? the solidarity among defectors come about because of their common vision to escape oppression, after having suffered similar experiences. a party is formed primarily because people share a set of ideals. so yea, i guess i'll miss every element of school life, from the yellow-slip issuing gorgon to say, frantically mugging for econs in the PA control, to of course the awesome parties every now and then.

now, there's really nothing wrong with missing all of these, given that I've spent 4 good years in this GREAT college. lol. it'll probably occupy a special place in my heart, and probably remain where it is, while people shelve these memories deeper and deeper into the back of their minds. hahah and there you have it, I who cannot get over anything. I who will remain worked up over the same old stupid issue that will seem so very insignificant in a mere 5 years. Maybe that's why I'm always bothered or burdened - because I can forgive but never forget (in some cases, I never forgive). hahah I guess it's high time I changed my outlook on life, pursue Buddhism to a higher level and attain nirvana. LOL.

and yes, as I was saying in my first sentence, it really worries me when I think about what's gonna happen to me in future. Will I keep harping onto the times I had in JC, good and bad? Will I be able to remove a scar laden facade and replace it with a blank sheet again? Indeed the injuries sustained have since healed and lessons have been internalised. but wounds will be wounds, there's bound to be a scar. Perhaps a scarf will do. A scarf to hide the impurities on my skin. At the very least, similar blades would be driven away.

oh yea anyway, CTs ARE COMING! SHINGZ! GP, ECONS AND LIT! i dont know why i'm still blogging when I should be flipping through my notes frantically! BUT IT'LL BE OVER ON FRIDAY! temporarily. then it's history consol for 2 freaking days. AND HONGKONGGG! YAY! but my sister wants to go to disneyland-.- again. and it's not like we're staying at the disneyland hotel. NO! so that means we'll have to wake up earlyyy in the morning just to catch a train to tung chung and then disney wtshit. i have to find a way to convince her to give disney a miss. hello, we're in hong kong for 4 days ONLY. can we at least shop the days away? or at least spend it well at some museum!

but, if we go to disney, I'll get to wear my pink shirt (which i got from bugis street. haha yes. i actually bought a non performance costume from bugis street!) which coincidentally has the same print as a dress I got from Korea last year! and it's pink too! adorable ttm!<3 Haven't planned my wardrobe for Hong Kong yet D: will do so next fri, after gp and econs and probably a movie marathon. then after that, I'll have to mug mug mug. life sucks D:

actually, I realised that blogging about happy things really cheers me up a great deal. I should do this more often. I really kinda miss blogging on a regular basis. yea! I should deactivate facebook and blog instead. heh! nobody reads my blog anyway! so I can just sound retarded here. (ok somehow, I can imagine a friend from somewhere thinking to his/herself, "and this idiot thinks no one reads her blog. LOL retard." aiyah, anyway, if you ever do read my blog, do tag! hahaha it's been a long time since I last saw actual tags by actual friends. somehow these blogwalkers/virus transmitters have infiltrated cbox tagboards? I see them everywhere. heh! okok I better go mug econs now! tata!

chendol